Sunday, May 6, 2012

Don’t come home a drinkin’…From the Heart Series



         It seems like I’ve been fixated as of late on drinking as in me starting to drink.

         It all began last weekend on the way home from a day at Madewood Plantation, where we attended a crawfish boil hosted by Ameriprise Financial. The Friday evening was spent at a family gathering at a local restaurant in honor on Hubby’s father’s birthday, where maybe half of his family actually acknowledged that I take up space. Then, on Saturday, just as we sat down to enjoy our boiled crawfish, we looked up just in time to see my ex sit down at the next table.

         Knowing that on Sunday we were attending a meet and greet of oldest son, Joshua, in-laws-to-be, and we’d also have to deal with Hubby’s ex, I may have mentioned to Hubby I was going to have to start drinking in order to deal with the stress. It was either that or start taking drugs. I thought drinking would taste better.

         Then, I really got on a roll. I told him I was going to be a loud, boisterous, happy, drunk. And, as if that weren’t enough, I was going to be a loud, boisterous, happy drunk who told people what she thought of them. By this time, I was absolutely pomaded (French for laughing), so much so that Hubby even started laughing (he doesn’t always laugh at my tirades.) I was so into character that I started a performance of just what a loud, boisterous, happy, drunk (aka me) would do. To try to recreate my antics in writing would be impossible. You’ll just have to use your imagination. It went a little like this:

         “Hey! (insert name) You wanta know what I think of you?” (Laughing)
         “No.”
         “Oh! Sure you do! I’m gonna tell you anyway! (Lots of laughing, loud, boisterous.) …

         You sorta had to be there, but believe me, if Hubby was laughing, it must have been funny. I am an introvert so far off the chart that I fell off the chart. I rarely tell people what I’m thinking because I wouldn’t dare want to hurt someone’s feelings. So, that’s why I decided that I would be a loud, slaphappy, boisterous, drunk.

         Then, yesterday, as I was adding Vermouth to a pasta dish I was making, I started wondering if I consume enough Vermouth in the guise of “deglazing” to be considered a drunk. Maybe I’ve already started drinking and I haven’t figured it out yet. This dish makes me happy. Ummm.




         So…what about you? What is going to drive you to drinking in your life? (You know you can tell me.)




(Now, just so everyone knows - I am not a drinker - I'm just speculating as to what kind of drunk I'd like to be - if I were drinking. About the only thing I've been known to drink (and it's been a while) is an Oreo Drink at one of the local bars. It is actually an Oreo milkshake with a little extra shake - if you know what I mean. I am also not condoning drinking in any way, shape, or form. This post was purely for entertainment and sake of a good discussion.)

Enhanced by Zemanta

11 comments:

  1. LOL! What a great story.
    I drink when I am happy. I just don't feel like it when I'm stressed or tired or sad because control is a big issue for me. So I drink when I celebrate, and I make a very very happy, giggly drunk. I like to eat junk food when I'm drunk and tell really stupid jokes.
    I do occasionally come close to "drunk" without realizing it when I have a bottle of very nice wine and I suddenly realize it is almost gone because it just tasted so good!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So glad you enjoyed the story! Thanks for stopping by and sharing. Smelling liquor makes me drunk! lol

      Delete
  2. Ha! Great story. When I was working in social work this phone call would happen at least once a week. "Hey Babe, I don't want to cook. Feel like going out for dinner?" "Sure Hun, where would you like to go." "Don't care I need a stiff drink." Now that I stay home with my babies I am too afraid to drink, what if they needed me and I was too drunk to take care of them. I am exactly the drunk you think you would be. My movements get huge and out of control. It is hysterical (at least in my mind) and I love everyone.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are too funny. My idea of a stiff drink is hot chocolate! Thanks for stopping by.

      Delete
  3. LOL! This was a funny story. I don't drink the stiff stuff anymore. It's usually wine or an occasional Margarita. While back in the day the first indication of too much was a permanent smile followed by laughter, now its seeing that I have fallen asleep without finishing my drink.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can kind of get into the pasted smile thing. :) I'd probably be snoozing before that second sip myself. Thanks for stopping by.

      Delete
  4. Your husband is one of the good guys! and your a crazy gal? with respect? I would be proud to call you friends

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Wingman! I couldn't wait to have you weigh in! My Hubby is a good guy. He rarely is entertained by some of my antics - when asked why - he told me he doesn't always know when I'm serious. lol I am usually the quiet one so he should figure it out that when I say I'm going to be boisterous, I must be kidding. He may still hide the bottle! Just to be safe.

      Delete
  5. lol. been working my way through a bottle of "Mommy's Time Out" wine.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I don't drink, but there are times when I have definitely felt the need. Hmmm, wonder what type of drunk I would be. =)
    thecuriouslifeofmaudette.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for visiting my blog and taking the time to comment! I really appreciate it! I read each and every response, and I love hearing thoughts and opinions from fellow bloggers, readers, and authors. If you have a blog, please leave a link so I can visit you back. Thank you.

I try to answer most comments, so if you would like to read my response, please visit often. Or, just click the "Email follow-up comments to [...]" box before publishing, to receive notification of new comments.

If you have to leave a comment anonymously, don't leave one at all. I will delete it. Own up to your thoughts.